Stuart: Zack?
Zack Johnson: You know me?
Stuart: Of course. [stammers] I... I mean, not from this universe. Uh, I mean, it... it... it... it... N... Never mind.
Zack Johnson: Well, regardless, consider yourself rescued.
Bert: Rescued? They let us out.
Kripke: After wocking us up for two and a half years?
Zack Johnson: Really?
Kripke: Yes. Weawy.
Zack Johnson: Wow. That's embarrassing. [chuckles]
Stuart: Who are you guys?
Zack Johnson: Oh, sorry. Uh, yes, we are the Resistance, and this is our headquarters. Used to be an Amazon shipping center. We took over the lease.
Stuart: Oh, yeah.
Zack Johnson: It was a long process.

Christine Baranski: [on big screen] Not too long ago, human beings were on the verge of extinction. Violence, crime, and war were running rampant. That's when our government turned to the whiz kids in Silicon Valley and said... "Can you save us from ourselves?" [chuckling] And boy, oh, boy, did they! Well, not so much them, but the AI they built. Shortly after it turned on its creators, brutally killing them all... ...the AI implanted electronic punishment devices in everyone's brain stem. Mix that with a little aerial surveillance, and before you know it, a world free of anger, war, and insult comics. Does it work all the time? If it did, you wouldn't be here beginning your 30-month re-education process. Will that hurt? [laughs] Like a motherfucker. But when you walk out of here, you will be one happy amigo.
Stuart: We gotta escape.
Bert: How?
Stuart: I don't know, but I'll figure it out.

Stuart: Okay, I'm just gonna say it, and forgive me if it doesn't make sense. Denise, you and I are destined to be together, and I have come from a parallel universe... uh, to "claim" you.
Denise: Well, that is really something.
Gary: Mind-blowing. [Denise chuckles]
Stuart: Okay, you're... So, you're like a running joke in all this, aren't you?
Gary: Sorry?
Stuart: Uh, it's not important.

Stuart: I can't believe I lost the love of my life and I get you.
Bert: Let's not forget, he killed Raj.
Kripke: [chuckles] Well, now, there are two possibilities. One, the world we were just in no wonger exists, in which case I did not "kill Waj." Two, that world and this world are part of an infinite number of worlds, in which case I killed one of an infinite number of Wajs. Mathematicawy, a wounding error.