Bert: Do the ankle wings do anything?
Jay Garrick / The Flash: No. They came with the boots.

Jay Garrick / The Flash: Oh, this is the most ridiculous story I've ever heard.
Stuart: [scoffs] You want ridiculous? You fought against Captain Boomerang, Captain Cold, and Captain Nazi.
Jay Garrick / The Flash: Hey, those were all formidable enemies. Boomerang kept coming back.

Denise: Can you not run without the helmet?
Jay Garrick / The Flash: [sighs] I can. It's just not as cool.

Jay Garrick / The Flash: See anything you like yet? How about this one?
[The group land with the Flash and his treadmill in the comic book store. The comic Stuart Fails to Save the Universe TRAPPED! is on display, its cover page blank except for the title.]
Stuart: Perfect. Thanks.
Jay Garrick / The Flash: All right. Got to go. Shabbat with my in-laws. Whoo-hoo.

Stuart: Let's see. Uh... City Hall, Wayne Tower, two miles down that way, Arkham Asylum. We're in Gotham City. Home of... Anyone?
Denise: [in gruff voice] Batman. [chuckles]
Stuart: How can I not love you?
Bert: So what? We just find Batman and he'll get us out of here?
Stuart: Denise.
Denise: [still in gruff voice] Batman won't help you. He's just a rich asshole with dead parents.
Kripke: Yeah, that's only funny once.
Denise: [still in gruff voice] Go fuck yourself.

Bert: If we need a superhero, why not just get Superman?
Stuart: So just get Superman? There's no way we can get Superman. He's an A-list character. The Flash, on the other hand, very gettable. He'll open a supermarket.

Kyle: Ah, ah, what are you doing?
Trevor: It said, "don't sell," not "don't read."
Kyle: First of all, "it" is a he.
Trevor: You don't know that.
Kyle: [sighs] It sounds like a he.
Trevor: You're making a gender-based assumption.
Kyle: When has an omnipotent swirling bowl of shit ever been a girl?
Trevor: There are plenty of all-powerful goddesses. Gaia, Hera, the hot chick in American Gods who sucked guys up into her business.
Kyle: [sighs] Put it back.
Trevor: Narc.