Amy Farrah Fowler: Who wants a Dr. Brown's?
Kripke: Well, I never say no to a diet black chewwy.
Amy Farrah Fowler: Coming right up.

Stuart: I know it sounds crazy... but Penny was like some kind of, uh, revolutionary guerrilla leader, uh, fighting against this AI government thing that put chips in everyone's neck.
Amy Farrah Fowler: And the chips, they were inserted with magic?
Stuart: N... No, no, that's... that's the next universe. That's a... that's a completely different ball of wax.
Amy Farrah Fowler: Right, sorry. "Different ball of wax."
Stuart: And I know you. I mean, uh, from my universe. But you weren't a psychiatrist, you were... were a neurobiologist.
Amy Farrah Fowler: Well, good for me. And this all happened before or after the apocalypse?
Stuart: Oh, before. After civilization collapsed, there wasn't a big demand for neurobiologists. Rat farmers, sure, you know? [chuckles] People gotta eat.
Amy Farrah Fowler: Uh-huh.

Amy Farrah Fowler: I made rugelach.
Jay Garrick / The Flash: Thanks, honey.
Amy Farrah Fowler: So, what's this all about?
Jay Garrick / The Flash: They want me to use the Cosmic Treadmill to get back to their universe.
Amy Farrah Fowler: Oh, great. Let them have it so I can park my car in the damn garage.

Amy Farrah Fowler: Okay, uh, here's what we're gonna do. Let's keep your Shamoxil where it is, and I'm going to double your dosage on Trafederine, see if that doesn't help.
Stuart: You think I'm crazy?
Amy Farrah Fowler: Oh... That's not a word we like to use around here, but... [grimaces]
Stuart: Doesn't matter. I... gotta get out of this place.
Amy Farrah Fowler: To go to a different universe?
Stuart: Not just different, a good universe. You know, without giant moths, or evil demons.
Amy Farrah Fowler: Right, sure. Well, if you make progress, it's not out of the question that someday you can leave.
Stuart: Someday? What... what... what does "someday" mean?
Amy Farrah Fowler: It means a vague time in an unspecified future.
Stuart: That sounds like never to me.
Amy Farrah Fowler: Oh, "never" is not a word we use around here. It can be upsetting.

Stuart: Let's see. Uh... City Hall, Wayne Tower, two miles down that way, Arkham Asylum. We're in Gotham City. Home of... Anyone?
Denise: [in gruff voice] Batman. [chuckles]
Stuart: How can I not love you?
Bert: So what? We just find Batman and he'll get us out of here?
Stuart: Denise.
Denise: [still in gruff voice] Batman won't help you. He's just a rich asshole with dead parents.
Kripke: Yeah, that's only funny once.
Denise: [still in gruff voice] Go fuck yourself.

Bert: If we need a superhero, why not just get Superman?
Stuart: So just get Superman? There's no way we can get Superman. He's an A-list character. The Flash, on the other hand, very gettable. He'll open a supermarket.

Kyle: Ah, ah, what are you doing?
Trevor: It said, "don't sell," not "don't read."
Kyle: First of all, "it" is a he.
Trevor: You don't know that.
Kyle: [sighs] It sounds like a he.
Trevor: You're making a gender-based assumption.
Kyle: When has an omnipotent swirling bowl of shit ever been a girl?
Trevor: There are plenty of all-powerful goddesses. Gaia, Hera, the hot chick in American Gods who sucked guys up into her business.
Kyle: [sighs] Put it back.
Trevor: Narc.