Denise: [scoffs] Oh, my God. Gary. Hi, Gary! [chuckles] Hey, Gary.
Gary: Have we met?
Denise: Gary, we were in a terrible marriage for six years. But we never fought, not once. 'Cause we had shock collars. They really hurt. You'd be getting all mad, and you'd be like... [grunts violently, coughs] You used to part your hair on the other side. I think I liked it better. [readjusts Gary's hair] Oh.

Stuart: So, what have you been up to?
Denise: Robbing mostly. Still working on my screenplay.
Stuart: Oh, good for you.

Denise: So, what were you in the before times?
Soldier #2: No talking.
Denise: Come on, I'm gonna die anyway.
Soldier #2: I had a podcast. Vitamins, gut health.
Denise: Nice.
Soldier #2: I had Gwyneth Paltrow on.
Denise: Oh, my God, I think I heard that. No, how a good gut biome prevents dementia.
Soldier #2: Yes!

Raj Koothrappali: Anyway, I... I... I've had time to... to... to figure it all out, and there's definitely something wrong with this reality. See? I... I prove it here and here, and the numbers, they don't lie.
Denise: So, you were telling the truth?
Stuart: You didn't believe me?
Denise: That an alternate version of you told you how to save the universe? No, not for a minute. [scoffs]

Kripke: We gotta get out of here.
Stuart: Why? It's not such a bad world. We could chill here for a while.
Kripke: Stuart, the people here think science is evil.
Stuart: How's that different from our world?

Wil Wheaton: [voice echoes] Stuart Bloom!
Stuart: Wil Wheaton?
Wil Wheaton: Did you give blood to Bernadette Rostenkowski?
Stuart: A little. Why?
Wil Wheaton: Oh, you stupid, stupid man. The guild sanctioned her for a reason.
Kripke: Oh, yeah, the dog. [nods]
Wil Wheaton: What dog? She's a demon.
Stuart: Oh, she can be a little bitchy. I wouldn't call her a demon.

Stuart: Besides, we can't leave without Bert and Denise.
Kripke: [chuckles] Bert will be fine, and you can always get a new Denise in the next universe. They're a dime a dozen.
Stuart: No, I want this one. She's got a little problem with the sauce, but so did my mom. Maybe that's why I'm finding her so attractive.